Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Sometimes gratitude is not easy

What am I grateful for today?

Well, not much ~
...It's still raining.
...I've struggled with a migraine much of the day.
...I can't find a comfortable office chair to use at my new church. Consequently my back is killing me.
...I'm aware that I needed some time to emotionally make the break from my old church. That was a mistake. I should have taken a few days off.
...I have countless little things I need to do, but 'big' stuff takes precedence during the day and in the evening I'm so exhausted that I just sit here and read blogs.
...I'm biting my nails. Which is a pretty neat trick, since they're the fake silk ones.
...I feel separated from my friends. Kinda lonely, really.
...I miss my old church. Even with all its problems, I was/am invested in it. I care about everyone there so much.

Great way to write about gratitude, huh?

Ugh. Let's see~
...Well, it's nice to be alone in the house tonight. Young Man with Integrity is out with friends, and D is auditioning for a play tonight at a community theater. Amazing. Wish I had the gumption to do something like that. I hope he gets it.
...
...
...

Sorry, folks. I know God is good. I know that abundant life is ours. I know that I am loved.

But I just don't feel any of that tonight. Guess I'll be content to just know it in my head, OK?

6 comments:

Rev SS said...

Tough season to be away from friends at the old church. Hope you can grab a day or two in the next week or too to grieve that loss.

Rev SS said...

week or two ...

Jan said...

Hope you headache is gone. I like it when you blog, even though you are down at yourself about it tonight. It's nice to see your face in so many comments!

Jiff said...

All will be well.
Listen to your heart- grab moments of peace when you can.
All will be well.
Love your new picture!!

Diane said...

yes, I hope your headache is gone. Oh,ish, it is hard to think about anything when that happens.

take care...

"PS" (a.k.a. purple) said...

Katherine,

Leaving is hard. We invest ourselves in the mire and muck and in the wonder and joy. Hope each day provides you a bit more peace.